My first attempt at a story

the classic taipei subway story of how I got violated by a small asian man on a subway

to make this shorter and sweeter, my buddy and I (cameron who had never traveled out of the U.S. in his life) had just arrived in Taiwan and managed to get kicked out of the house we were staying at in two days... with 14 days still left in our trip.

So there we are, 7 AM on the side of the road hailing a taxi in Taipei, no idea what to do... also slightly traumatized.

We find a hostel and sleep for 14 hours straight... upon waking with a determination not to let our trip go to waste, I don my most touristy clothing in an effort to get back at Taiwan which had just made a valiant attempt to defeat myself and my adventure partner.

To Taipei 101 (second tallest building in the world), through the subway, the jammed,crowded subway in my fedora, white aviator shades, Hawaiian shorts and Hawaiian shirt.

Real cynical me, decked out

On the subway... angry at the world.... abandoned in a foreign country

I'm of a mood and as I am standing there... I feel something... just a little brushing around my groin region.

I'm on a CRAMMED subway... it's nothing.

It happens again...just a quick little something bothering my business downstairs, I look down and see nothing but notice this asian guy with his hair all crazy and his man satchel hanging from his shoulder kind of giving me the sketch eye.  You know when a person just keeps weirdly looking at you out of the corner of his eye?

I'm a little weirded out but again i tell myself i'm on a subway.

AGAIN, it happens this time I look and see his hand kind of turned towards me... so in my asshole american outfit I STARE him down... but i'm still unsure if what I think is happening is happening...

only when I see him leave me (who just unknowingly caught him in the act) and go stand by my homophobic buddy on the other side of the car do I realize this guy is some sort of weird American violater.

As I see my buddy twitch and struggle uncomfortably next to this tiny little asian man who is now making moves on my buddy, I start laughing OUT LOUD on a crowded subway in my american clothing.  I don't care about a thing except that I've just participated in one of the most hilarious experiences of my life.  So I continue to Laugh obviously in the twilight zone.

The violater gets off the train.  I walk over to my buddy and ask simply, straightforward, "were you just touched?"  He said quietly, almost sad, "yes, *sniffle* yes I was"

and so began our journey in Taiwan.

And ended with this guy teaching me how to surf.  When all the hostels were booked he let us crash at his place.